I just finished attending a number of workshops at the singles conference today. I was uplifted and inspired to be a better me and to do my part to achieve my goal of getting married.
The paradox of the day was when my friends gave up trying and pulled me down with them..
Have you ever felt like your friends want you to take them as they are but want you to be who they want, not who you are. Now that we've reached the end of two long days with a 2 hour drive ahead of us I am feeling very disgruntled and uncouth. I have been treated all day as though I were a joke or completely unmannered. I always leave these events entirely depressed and demoralized - despite my best intentions and efforts. The paradox comes in because I allowed my friends to read my Introspections piece and I kind of wish I hadn't. I don't feel like they get me. I am a person afterall, not a running joke that needs constant correction. I feel like I try to pep them up and try to help and all I get in return is the feeling that my friends think I am immature and annoying.
Great end to a day, huh?
One final note: we are trying to start a regional mid-singles group here and have met many mid-singles from our 9 stake group at recent activities. We have about 20 people showing up at activities. Several of those people have known each other longer and though none of us belong to the geographically targeted stakes for this conference they formed an exclusive group and ignored us at both the Friday night and Saturday night dances. How does that help to build a program?!
Can you see the pain behind the smirk? Or hear the sob behind the laugh? They're on the edge of the shadow.
